Worldwide, more than 84 percent of single parents comprise single mothers. Whereas, only 15 percent of single parents are single fathers. This shows that women around the world perform the primary responsibility of child-rearing and managing the economic survival of the family.
In this blog post, you will explore some of the most common obstacles that single parents or single mothers face. You will also get insights to navigate these difficulties with strength and courage.
Overall, men are more likely to remarry after leaving their offspring with their mothers or other female relatives. Whereas, single parent families led by single mothers are usually a result of separation, divorce, widowhood, teenage or unplanned pregnancies, and some other reasons.
These reasons when combined with social norms or laws challenge women’s possibility to get remarried.
Single parent and solo parent are interchangeably used across the web. However, there is a slight difference between the two terms. Single parents refer to people who fulfill the child-rearing responsibilities but have some sort of emotional, financial, and physical support from a partner, spouse, or co-parent who remains absent most of the time from the lives of the children. Solo parents are those who have no financial, emotional, physical, or any other form of support from a partner, spouse, or co-parent. This article is intended to focus on solo parents, to be specific solo mothers, but since the term single parents is widely used therefore we have used single parents instead of solo parents. To learn more read The Difference between Solo Parenting and Single Parenting |
Single Mother Parenting Difficulties
Parenting in general is a challenging responsibility and being a single parent is a journey filled with many obstacles and complexities. Below you will learn the difficulties faced by single parents.
1. Financial Stress
Managing and keeping up with finances is one of the most significant challenges for single mothers or single parents. Due to the unavailability and support of a partner or spouse, the responsibility to fulfill finances is on one person’s shoulder. So single mothers must provide food, shelter, clothing, healthcare, and educational facilities.
Single mothers often struggle to cover these expenses because every dollar must be carefully spent to ensure that family needs are met. Hence budgeting becomes complex and single mothers are often involved in earning money from different jobs.
Constant financial pressure and seeking additional income sources lead to exhaustion and burnout. It makes it difficult to save money for future and unexpected expenses.
2. Psychological and Emotional Stress
Single mothers often face emotional and psychological stress stemming from immense child-rearing responsibilities. They face burdens when making big or small decisions, maintaining discipline, and providing a nurturing environment. This can be daunting, especially during times of stress and crisis.
They encounter challenges and difficulties without a partner or a co-parent. Hence, most single mothers or single parents suffer from psychological stress, feelings of loneliness, and self-doubts.
Single mothers or single parents are lone warriors. They have to manage their emotions and stress to provide a stable, supportive, and nurturing environment for their children.
3. The Feeling of Guilt
Despite all the challenges and stress, single mothers often feel guilty. They question their ability of not doing enough for their children. They also question their decision-making skills and doubt if they made the right choice that was best for their children.
This is another kind of stress that they face because they usually don’t have a partner or co-parent to share responsibilities to provide better facilities to their children. Or to celebrate the right choices.
4. Managing the Time
Single mothers often face difficulties in managing time between their jobs, house chores, and parental responsibilities. As they don’t have a co-parent to share the load therefore single parents are often stretched thin, juggling with multiple roles at a time.
Overburden of tasks and lack of time lead to exhaustion. Also because their responsibilities leave them with little or no time for themselves to relax.
5. Social Support
Single mothers often face isolation and a lack of support from society. They find it difficult to get support from friends and sometimes even family members who actually understand their challenges and difficulties.
Due to the lack of a co-parent to share parenting responsibilities and provide emotional support, single mothers experience a sense of disconnection from social gatherings and activities. Their loneliness lowers their self-esteem and discourages their social involvement.
6. Social Acceptance
Single parents often face social segregation in different forms. In various societies, single mothers are seen as inferior species. They are seen as a poor and vulnerable group, responsible for poverty and crime rates.
As they are assumed poor therefore they are not considered to get a place for rent or worthy of friendship, etc. Moreover, they also face isolation because people see them as a burden and they don’t want to bear any tasks related to their children.
7. Job and Career Development
Single parents especially single mothers face great difficulty in getting a job that matches their education or experience. Even if she gets a job she faces challenges to secure career development opportunities.
Moreover, white-collar jobs come with great responsibilities. Hence, it becomes difficult to get flexible working hours or to do remote work. It’s also tough to take a day off or to leave early.
Despite job responsibilities, employers do not nominate single parents for career advancement opportunities because they believe that they are preoccupied with family responsibilities.
8. Impact on Children
If you are living in a hostile and violent environment then single parenting can be a good decision. It can provide you and your children with a peaceful environment that can increase their well-being.
Otherwise, single parent’s biggest challenge can be the impact of single parenting on the well-being of their children. Getting a separation, divorce, or entering widowhood can leave a gap in children’s lives. They can face insecurity, anxiety, or feel ignorant. They might openly express how they miss their other parent.
Such a situation can increase the challenges of single mothers. Especially when they have to be the breadwinner, caregiver, nurturer, and provide physical and emotional support to their children.
Tips for Single Mother Parenting
1. Manage Your Finances
The first tip for single mother parenting is to wisely manage your finances. If you feel secure with your finances you can focus on other important things. Start cutting off items or expenses that aren’t necessary.
For starters, make sure that you aren’t living in a place that is expensive for you. Move to an economical or cheaper locality with a small house. Create a budget that covers mandatory items like housing, utilities, groceries, education, childcare, etc.
If you need any house items try to look for second-hand or used items. Look for ways you can cut your budget and save money.
2. Build a Strong Support Network
A good and reliable support network can be the most valuable asset for a single mother. Build a strong relationship with your parents and siblings. These are the people who will always stand by you. So don’t undervalue their presence and support.
Of course, there are things that you can’t share with your parents or siblings. So become friends with people who actually understand your problems and provide genuine support and guidance when needed.
A good support system can offer you emotional support and provide practical advice and assistance when required. If you don’t have these options then try and look for local and online parenting groups and forums. Connect with community organizations who understand your needs and challenges.
3. Focus Your Children
As a single mother, your children are the center of your world. They look up to you for every single thing in their lives. Even though your responsibilities leave you with little time but never ignore your children. Always give them the time they need and focus on their thoughts and issues.
Create an environment of effective communication between you and your children. Listen to their thoughts and concerns. Try to understand their feelings. Give them the support they need. This will strengthen your relationship with them and it will make your life easy. Consequently, you see its positive benefits in the long run.
4. Focus on Yourself
Your self-care is significant for your physical and mental well-being. As a single parent don’t ignore yourself. Try to make time for yourself by engaging in activities that make you calm and relaxed.
Remember, you can be a better parent if you are healthy and in a state of mental and emotional stability.
5. Ask for Help and Share Responsibilities
Don’t hesitate to ask for help from your family and friends. Moreover, if your children are old enough then try to share your house chores or responsibilities with them. There is no age limit for asking for help from your children. You can start early by giving them small tasks.
Sharing your workload will give them an idea about your situation. This will save you time, make your children responsible, alleviate stress, and build a stronger bond between you and your children.
When doing so always remember that they are your kids and not an adult. So never treat them as a substitute for your partner and never look for their sympathy.
6. Focus on Your strengths with Realistic Expectations
Many single parents put in extra effort and try to achieve things they are not good at. Such actions put an extra burden on their shoulders which leads to burnout. Therefore, as a single mother be realistic with your capabilities.
You should recognize your limits and resources and plan accordingly. Prioritize tasks that are most important to you and set realistic goals. Don’t waste your energy on doing things that you are not good at. Instead, focus on your strengths.
7. Remain Positive
Single parenting requires you to go the extra mile for your children. This can be daunting and can drain your emotional and physical capabilities. It can also make you feel that you are not doing enough. In such situations always remain positive.
Try not to stress out by focusing on the blessings you have. These can be little things. Such as be thankful for the food you eat or a hug or kiss from your child. Don’t ruin your day by running behind things that are out of your control.
8. Create memories
As human beings, we have limited control over things in our lives. Therefore, act wisely and celebrate both big and small achievements with your children. This can be anything from a birthday, a good decision, or an academic achievement.
Celebrate what you have in your life and make good memories that your children can look up to.
9. Look for Professional Help
Multitasking and performing dual responsibilities can negatively impact your physical and mental health. When you feel that pain and pressure in your life never hesitate to seek professional help.
Remember that you have to be there for your children in the long run. So instead of dragging things and making them worse get help.
10. Embrace Technology
In today’s digital world technology can be a valuable tool for single mothers. You can use different applications and resources to organize your household tasks, manage schedules, keep an eye on your children’s activities, and remain connected with their teachers.
Moreover, you can find online support groups and resources that can provide valuable information and guide you in difficult times.
Concluding Remarks
Single parents encounter various challenges. Hence they need strength, resilience, and adaptability to overcome them. Effectively managing time, finances, and emotional and physical stress can help them navigate their lives.
In this journey, don’t hesitate to ask for support from friends and family. Always remember that it’s not your fault and never ignore your kids and try to spend quality time with them.
2 Comments
You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be actually something that I think I would never understand.
It seems too complicated and extremely broad for me.
I’m looking forward for your next post, I’ll try
to get the hang of it!