The evolution of social patterns has given rise to single parent families. Hence, single parents raise their children in many parts of the world. However, the difficulties of single parenting is a topic that is not broadly discussed. Today, only in the U.S. there are nearly a quarter of children that live with a single parent.
In this article, you will learn about nine difficulties of single parents and tips that they can adopt to overcome them.
But first…
Who is a Single Parent or What is a Single Parent Family?
Single-parent families are families where a single mom or a single dad raises their children. In some cases, a grandparent or an aunt or uncle is responsible for raising a child or children.
The person responsible for parenting is a single individual. Therefore, it becomes very stressful for him or her to consider every matter and take care of everything.
Certain causes result in single parent families. The most common reason is if a person gets a divorce, or becomes a widow then he or she gets the responsibility to raise the children.
However, some people choose to be single parents for certain reasons. Moreover, early teenage pregnancies can also result in single-parenting for some females.
Learn about the Difference between Single Parent vs Solo Parent
Difficulties of Single Parenting
Below discussed are some difficulties of single parenting.
1. Low Financial Resources
Single parents often find it difficult to properly manage their expenses and finances. As a single parent, the flow of income can be low. This can make it difficult for parents to manage their budgets.
Along with this, single parenting means fulfilling the dual responsibilities of a mother and a father. When alone, single parents have to provide food, shelter, education, health, and much more to their children.
These responsibilities make it difficult for them to plan how much to spend in the present and how much to save for the future.
2. Less Family Time
Despite fulfilling the financial responsibilities, one important part of parenting is to spend quality time with your children. Through this parents get the opportunity to learn about their children’s strengths and weaknesses.
Single parents often juggle with tasks related to their job, household chores, and giving time to their children. This can have long-lasting negative consequences on the mental health of the children. It can also impact the parents with the guilt of not spending time with their children.
3. Adverse Consequences on Children
When nuclear families break into single-parent families it can have adverse consequences on children. Such children might face difficulties adjusting to new parenting styles. They might feel neglected, unheard, or unloved at times.
Transitioning from nuclear families to single families can also impact the educational and extracurricular activities of children. Their performance can drop and they can exhibit less confidence and motivation.
Such feelings can lead them to isolation or make them hostile and aggressive. They might throw unnecessary tantrums and demand extra attention which can increase problems and the level of difficulty for single parents.
4. Lone Warrior
Another difficulty of single parenting or solo parenting is that they are lone warriors. Holding the battlefield on their own. Hence, handling too much pressure and workload can often lead to depression. Therefore single parenting can steer parents to a point where they feel stuck and burned out.
Single parents can also face this situation because they don’t have a present co-parent with whom they can discuss or share their daily problems. They have to rely on their family members or friends with whom they can get some emotional support. Or who can guide them in their difficult times.
5. Rigid Work Schedule
A single parent is responsible for managing each and everything for their children. Therefore, they are overburdened to look after everything. This includes things as big as buying or renting a house, taking children to the doctor, and small stuff like throwing out the garbage.
Fulfilling financial expenses as well as performing household chores can be daunting. Hence single parents may experience rigid work schedules which can drain their emotional and physical capabilities.
6. Difficulties in Building New Relations
Single parents can find it difficult to build new relationships. One core reason that holds them back is the fear of rejection from their children. So even if a single parent finds a partner they find it difficult to tell it to their children.
In some cases, it can also get difficult for their children to accept and get along with the new person. Or to give them respect and the place of their absent parents. Hence, getting approval from the children is a major hurdle that single parents face.
7. Social Attitudes
Society just ignores the situation and reasons of a person being a single parent. This is the cause why single parents often face difficulties in social acceptance. People often look down upon single parents, especially single mothers.
They can face rejection when finding a place to rent or when they try to be social. Single parents receive negative attitudes from society, particularly when the person is not divorced or widowed.
In other cases, single parents are seen as strugglers and people often pity them for their challenges and difficulties.
8. Difficulty in Getting Job Advancement and Promotions
As single parents are more mentally occupied therefore they might face discrimination for career advancement opportunities and getting promotions.
Employers perceive them as preoccupied with house and children’s responsibilities. Therefore, they avoid nominating them for career development programs or giving them promotions.
9. Fighting the Custody Battle
Historically, the death of a spouse used to be the reason for single parent families. Now, the rise in single parent families is a result of mostly divorce, separation, and some other reasons. When parting ways, parents go into a battle to get custody of the children.
Custody battles are one of the major difficulties of single parenting. It can be challenging to work on common grounds for both custodial and non-custodial parents. This includes splitting the finances, planning visits, and establishing boundaries on childcare responsibilities.
Explore more about Solo Parenting and What its like to be a Solo Parent?
Tips to Overcome These Difficulties
As mentioned above, single parenting can be hard in many ways. There is no one formula that can fix the challenges of single parents. However, single parents can adopt some practices that can help them to cope with their difficulties.
1. Staying Positive
In the time of difficulty staying positive is the first rule that can help you with your challenges and difficulties. Instead of getting stressed out and ignoring your children, try to remain positive. Focus on your blessings and achievements. And don’t let negative thoughts ruin your day.
2. Focus on Your Children
Your children look at you every single day. Ignoring them can not only damage their development process but it can develop long-term problems and challenges for you as well.
Try to give as much attention to your children as you can. Share your minor problems with them. This will help them understand your situation and make them responsible.
Instead of shouting, try to talk with your children and know how they feel in certain situations. Involve them in house chores and give them minor tasks. This will divide your responsibility and your children will get disciplined.
3. Establish Ground Rule
Rules are very important to create an environment of discipline. Hence it is always helpful to establish some ground rules that everyone is aware of. Rules also act as a guidance for your children. It gives them direction and sets their limits.
4. Focus on Your Well-Being
In order to provide your children a quality life it is important to take care of your well-being. When you are mentally and physically healthy you are confident and satisfied with your life.
This state of mind makes you feel comfortable and you are more likely to have better relations with your children, friends, and family. You can achieve mental and physical well-being by accepting what you have and stop blaming for what you don’t have.
5. Connect With Family and Friends
Family and friends are very important in life and they can help you in many ways. If you are a single parent then your family and friends can be a blessing.
You can rely on them and ask for help in difficult times. Therefore, try to build a healthy relationship with your parents, siblings, and friends.
The Benefit of a Single Parent
Single parents face lots of difficulties but there are some positive aspects of being a single parent.
- As a single parent or solo parent you don’t have to spend time focusing on the needs of your spouse or partner. Hence, you have all the time to focus on your children.
- Living with your spouse or partner means you have to be on the page. This becomes difficult when your thoughts aren’t aligned with your partner. This can turn a simple discussion into fights and conflicts that can result in an intense home environment. But being a single parent or solo parent you can provide a peaceful home environment that is important for children.
- In single parenting, you don’t have to take approvals or convince your spouse or partner when making a decision. It gives you the independence to take decisions that you think are best for your children.
Concluding Remarks
Difficulties of single parenting can vary across societies. But in the end, most single parents share common challenges. Mostly revolving around financial resources, child-rearing, and spending quality time with children.
In doing so, most parents avoid their needs and interests. To manage things smoothly single parents can rely on a good support system that can help them to cope with the difficulties and make life easy for them.
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